Friday night was a bore. There is no way I could write an entire post about the night and still maintain your good will. There was no drama, no comedy, but there was a bit of romance. It’s one of these Sid and Nancy couples who break up and get back together. They both drink [...]
No! Tonight was a perfect example of that. Exhibit A: Laker Fan. Laker fan comes in usually on a Sunday night during happy hour looking for the Laker game. He’s actually a nice guy, but, generally, a pain in the ass. The thing about Laker Fan is that he pretty much only orders potato skins [...]
Did anyone catch the Flight of the Conchords episode a week ago where Jermaine dates Keitha, an Aussie? It was the funniest episode I’ve seen, if only for their mockery of Australians. Every scene Keitha was in, cracked me up. With this episode in mind, tt was fitting that the Santa Monica rugby club was [...]
I broke my phone, again. I do remember banging into something. This time it wasn’t the screen, it was the keyboard. When I originally bought the phone, I figured I wouldn’t get insurance, since I had it on my last phone and it never broke. I should’ve anticipated running into the bar at full speed [...]
It’s quite an impressive drug. Just a few shots and your whole mouth is numb. I was told that it would last for two hours. It’s been two and a half and my jaw still feels more swollen than the elephant man’s skull. Yes, I went back to the dentist for my shakedown, a crown [...]
After a craptastic Friday night, I figured people were just boning up for Saturday, which, coincidentally, was the most obnoxious holiday in the calendar, Valentine’s Day. I don’t understand why florists and restauranteurs feel that they can gouge the public just because Hallmark told them so. Last year Valentine’s Day was on a Thursday and [...]
What’s the deal with Friday the 13th? I remember it’s been scary since that dip shit Jason put on a hockey mask and slaughtered those crazy kids at the former summer camp. I always thought it would be more realistic if they camped some place really dangerous, like the Venice boardwalk, as opposed to the [...]
The physical was pretty uneventful. No, my doctor didn’t jam her fist, wrist-deep, into my hole, but it did remind me of the doctor who did. He was a friend of the family who I called, “Uncle.” He wasn’t a proctologist. He wasn’t even a doctor. In fact, I’m not sure why his hands were [...]
At 7:18 p.m. from an unknown ISP in North America on Saturday, February 7th, I got my 7000th hit. I wish I could be more specific on the location, but all sitemeter.com gave me was this continent. When that 7000th visitor clicked on my blog, I was deep in the weeds, in one of the [...]
On a slow night, I try and figure out a title for my blog. I got to work in the pouring rain and there were only two customers watching Braveheart. Personally, with the exception of special events, presidential debates, elections, or the Oscars, I feel that there should only be sports on our TVs. Every [...]